My first STD was from a foam party
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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