can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
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