i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
