At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Randomize
