So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
His hands were made for my vagina.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
