I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i think i have herpe
just one?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
