i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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