She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
