Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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