We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize