i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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