I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
