what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
