White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
