UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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