it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize