so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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