that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
