how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
