I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
it glows. i had to have it.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You're breaking my sexual little heart
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize