he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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