I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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