just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
