I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
