He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
