Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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