I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
