When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
So much Jack, so little girl.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
