I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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