the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
