Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize