garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
