It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize