I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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