so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
