their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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