I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
