her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I lost the right to judge tonight
you made out with another girl for some wings
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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