don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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