you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
True strength comes from lack of pants
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize