Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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