pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
