Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
