is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
