I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Non-Jews are for practice
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
