I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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