Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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