yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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