Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
