Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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