Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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